female woes and bonuses

Posted By Cassandra Disque on April 28, 2009

My husband freaked out awhile back because he saw that I paid $40 for a bra, which he thinks is insane. He thinks that’s a good price for shoes, and that’s about it.

I’m a 36-38D, depending on the cut. If I don’t want a very matronly bra or a piece of crap that’s going to fall apart in a few weeks, then yes, the motherfuckers are expensive little things.

But try explaining this to a man who goes to work with bleach stains on his jeans and holes in his t-shirts.

I did it to myself, going from dating nothing but metrosexuals to marrying a dirty ex-pro skater. Augh!

Well, I’m having my revenge. Obama’s stimulus package is giving everyone on Social Security on extra $150 in the month of May. My tits have grown and they need more coverage, so I’m spoiling them with $150 worth of Bare Necessities. My boobs and I thank you, Mr. President.

Categories: Personal is Political
Tags:

About the author

Cassandra Disque

Extemporaneous flibbertigibbet with bone lumps growing out of my coccyx. I was born in 1981. I was another case of "too much, too young," or at least I wanted to be. Now I'm leaning toward "too little, too late," as my body conks out on me, and I find I haven't done hardly any of the things I wanted. This is supposed to happen to people twice my age, so you might find my perspective on life to be a little unusual -- as in, I find just about everything to be hysterically funny, because there's little use in worrying when it's all going to go kaput.

Comments

One Response to “female woes and bonuses”

  1. Carrie Burrows says:
    May 1, 2009 at 9:03 pm

    Good lawd. My b-cups kill my back sometimes…I can’t even imagine!

Leave a Reply

«     »

"The Drag of Gimp"

Since 1996, my life has been a long journey of visiting one doctor after another. I look more or less fine, but I'm not. My daily pill count is like playing the dozens with a hospice patient. One doctor will say I'm doomed, and send me to another for treatment, but the treating doctor will find nothing within his or her area of practice that can be treated.

My life is better than a comedy, better than a drama. Anyone who has done this knows what I mean when I say that you have to not only know the rules, but also play the part in order to be allowed in the game. Most people find what we go through in the medical merry-go-round to be unbelievable, which is why I call it "The Drag of Gimp."


About the author

Cassandra Disque

Extemporaneous flibbertigibbet with bone lumps growing out of my coccyx. I was born in 1981. I was another case of "too much, too young," or at least I wanted to be. Now I'm leaning toward "too little, too late," as my body conks out on me, and I find I haven't done hardly any of the things I wanted. This is supposed to happen to people twice my age, so you might find my perspective on life to be a little unusual -- as in, I find just about everything to be hysterically funny, because there's little use in worrying when it's all going to go kaput.